The Illusion of Certainty
Have you ever argued with someone about what really happened—only to discover you both remembered the same event differently?
We assume that we know past events because we lived them.
However, our memories might not be as accurate as we think.
Author Derek Sivers reminds us that what we call the past isn’t an objective record—it’s one version of the story, filtered through our limited perspective.
“We think of the past like it’s a physical fact — like it’s real. But we never have all the information — only interpretation. One story based on one point of view: that’s what we call ‘the past.’”
Useful Not True, by Derek Sivers
Memories are interpretations, not necessarily facts. We lived in the past with our unique perspectives and interpretations, albeit without complete knowledge.
One Event, Many Stories
This explains why people who live through the same events can have very different, even contradictory memories of what happened.
Police officers will tell you it’s not uncommon for witnesses of an accident to have very different memories of what happened.
In my own family, our children have very different memories of events that we shared. One time, my wife was talking with our son; he had one memory, she had a very different memory. My son insisted that his version was correct since “I was there, Mom.”
What This Means for Us
I’ve seen people get into heated disagreements about what happened in the past.
Instead of insisting on being right about the past, we can choose to be generous.
If our own memories aren’t perfect, maybe the best gift we can give others is understanding when their memories don’t match ours.
AI Note: I wrote this blog post myself, using my own words and thoughts for the initial draft. I used AI only to suggest headlines, section headings, and text improvements.
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